Developing Self-Esteem in Children
Self-esteem is defined as “confidence in one’s own worth or abilities”. As parents, we have a major role to play in developing our children’s self-esteem. Use the below tips to ENHANCE your children’s self-esteem.
Encourage rather than praise. While praise focuses on the outcome, and says, “well done, keep it up”, encouragement places greater emphasis on the effort, regardless of the results. This helps children internalize the importance of trying again in the face of failure, thereby making them resilient and more confident.
Nurture them through active listening. Active listening means hearing them out without interruptions. Most of the time, children are looking for a safe sounding board to think aloud. They do not want your advice or solutions. All they want is a non-judgmental listener who can help them find their own solutions.
Help your children learn new skills. New skills build confidence, and in the long run aid in developing a positive self-esteem. Instead of doing everything for your children, encourage them to attempt various tasks themselves. The more they succeed at a variety of tasks, the better their self-esteem is bound to be.
Assign age-appropriate household chores. Being involved in running the household can help children develop a sense of responsibility, thus making them feel like effective contributors to the family.
Never engage in name-calling and verbal abuse. These can erode your children’s self-confidence and make them see themselves negatively. If you must reprimand your children, focus on the present, separate the deed from the doer and always uphold their dignity. Communicate to them that you disapprove of the behavior that is unacceptable, not them as individuals.
Comparisons must be banished! There is no such thing as a “positive comparison”. For children to feel respected and cherished, ensure that you never compare them, to their siblings, friends, neighbors, cousins or anyone else.
Ensure that you spend quality time with your children. Spending quality time with children makes them feel secure and confident.
